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It’s that gut turning deep-seated feeling

when you wanna quit, break, and cry

except you cannot find any good reason to

as a consequence, the well comes up dry.

 

Days go by and unwanted anger sets in

loneliness begins to build discontentment,

people sense this, finally leaving you alone

pseudo-split personality develops resentment.

 

I feel upset when I finally get what I want

in the boredom of not having to seek it,

Anxious hands start to stutter lines of code

only as much as this evil will selfishly permit.

 

Dismal starry-less nights come and quickly pass

reoccurring nightmares of my past soon aggravate,

the Devil’s hand on my neck has also grown tired

absent-minded nomadic lifestyle begins to captivate.

 

Impractical dreaming of life out on the open road

to fly solo, cross country, just a pack on my back,

I could never do such a thing realistically knowing

that all my worries could not fit into just one knapsack.

 

So the pain drives deeper into my soul once again

loneliness arises, triumphantly making me nervous

as the pain in my chest grows tighter and tighter

struggling to hold my breath just waiting to resurface.

 

©2019 http://www.whatsinsideamadmanshat.com

 

10 comments

  1. I can relate to this poem. These lines especially resonated with me – when you wanna quit, break, and cry
    except you cannot find any good reason to
    as a consequence, the well comes up dry.

    I also get this feeling of stuffing a few things in my backpack and setting off on a journey, but then reality brings me back.

    Liked by 1 person

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